I've been wondering lately and not-so-lately why I cannot seem to enjoy anything. I can be good at things--yes, but I cannot seem to enjoy anything worthwhile. It's always been separate from my confusion as to why I seem to be horrible at relationships. And the answer, I think, is at least partially found in Kantianism. I treat everything, humans and hobbies alike as a means to an end--every holiday, every worthwhile book, every friend serves as a means to an end. But nothing can be enjoyed if it is simply a means. I'm sorry, that's not quite right. Yes, things can be enjoyed as a means to an end--but they will always be unsatisfactory. Take a book for example: I would never enjoy Chronicles of Narnia if I were told that it is a spectacular scholarly book that I MUST enjoy if I ever want to be considered a literature student. I read Narnia because it soothes me and yet it is intellectually enlightening at the same time. It brings me joy -- and more joy than pure entertainment.
So, Kant said we cannot treat PEOPLE as a means to an end because they are rational beings. But I say we cannot treat anything as a means to an end--yes, we can and should do things as stepping stones to what we really want but our ultimate goal cannot be to please people or to feed our pride or loneliness.
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