You know it's a bad day

You know it's a bad day when you read a book of love poetry and two children's books. You know it's a bad day when someone else's emotionally charged Facebook post invokes emotions that you buried deep inside and you start to cry. You know it's a bad day when you go on a hike at night with friends and your childhood phobias of hikes creep up to you but your dad isn't there to hold your hand anymore.

You know it's a bad day when you try listening to Disney music but even that can't cheer you up. You know it's a bad day when you can almost feel the chemicals being released in your brain as you cry in relief because crying is the only effort you make to communicate your emotions besides "bleeding on paper" like Hemingway suggested.

You know it's a bad day when you google Chopin sheet music at 3 am in the middle of a breakdown just because you want the familiarity of looking at music notes shaped like bean sprouts. You know it's a bad day when you decide to listen to Chopin after that.

You know it's a bad day when you have a headache that encompasses not just your head but all your nerves.

You know it's a bad day when you feel like no one has your back. You know it's a bad day when you're trying, really trying to make friends but you can't help but wonder if you are gonna end up alone like you always do.

You know it's a bad day when the best quote you think of is "the only reason I make memories is to write about them."

You know it's a bad day when you're trying to write something worthwhile and the only word you can think of is "cry."