I don't think I've ruminated this idea well enough yet but I'm gonna have a go at this.

We all find our value in who others think we are, right?
I mean there are those amazing few who are confident in themselves so much so that they really don't care what people think. They just live their lives.

But honestly?
I don't think that's possible without risking hurting people. If what people think doesn't affect you at all, then you risk becoming unfeeling. There's  the other option of setting your beliefs straight but being sensitive to others when it comes to things that are worthy of compromise, like the type  food you share for a meal. In this case, you would stay to your beliefs. But you would shed the unnecessary dividers.

There's also a fourth option. This is one I have been ruminating on.
I feel that as a child of the King, I'm supposed to find my value solely in Him.
Then, why do I find myself longing for other people's approval. Almost everything I say or refrain from saying is done to please someone else, and I try to please someone else because if they are pleased with me, I feel like my value has increased. Come on, I know you feel that way sometimes.

So now I come to the question: Is it ever wrong to perform to get approval To try to prove my value to my peers? If it is wrong, if my value has to depend on God's opinion of me alone, then I definitely am failing.

Because the smallest touch affirms me.
And the smallest touch makes me feel I'm more valuable.

If these small touches I long for are wrong, then I am left depending on God alone for approval. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But I still long for other people to like me.


so here's my concluding question
the last patch of grass in my long ramble in the park of questions:

is it wrong that I want to be liked?
is it wrong, God?
Help me