Darkness

My arm flails forward
I strain to feel
Darkness ahead
It seems

I need to feel
I need to see
Don't feel like rising
From this agony

Two Melodies

Hand in hand
Toe entwined around toe
Heart to heart

I sang high
You sang low
But never was a more perfect note.

Endless summer nights
But even the hot wind
Didn't blow our notes away.

No two snowflakes are the same
But ours fit right into each other
Two melodies
Blend in perfect harmony.


Eheh cheesy much?

May I Have This Dance #2

May I have this dance
one more song with you
May I have this song
Just one last time

Do you remember how we used
 to frolick without a care
In the hot white sand.

I still remember

How could I forget
The way we sang in perfect harmony, two melodies
How could I forget
How we danced the night a
way.
Even the wind seems to say

May I have this dance
One more song with you
May I have this song
just one last time

Our hearts are burning
Our souls trembling.
We will have this dance
Before goodbyes.




A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

I live in a box.
And every day, not many enter.
I sometimes stick a finger or toe out.
And then you'll see me.

Other people have shown themselves to each other.
And I peek out of my box enviously.
I go to the parties and see new friendships born.

But I am not usually part of it.

You see,
I have spent my days absorbed in myself.
I am too self-centred.

And my heart longs for somebody to care.
For somebody to pull me out of the box
And embrace me in my truth.

But you see,
I don't open my box
Because I am guilty.

I am guilty of the times where
I have been absorbed in a story
Not giving a friendship my best.

I am guilty because I am next to never somebody's shoulder to cry on.

I am guilty because I claim to follow Christ
But I don't love the people around me.

I am guilty.
And that, is why my box remains closed.


Maybe it's time to open it up.
Maybe it's time to care about someone else for a change.

I stand alone
I feel the sand blowing in my face
But I don't feel courageous.

My weaknesses,
They scream.
My mask,
It thickens.

I am waiting for a new song
God, I know my feet are weak.

You call me to rise and dance
My fears You wash away.

And here I am
Teach me, I pray.

For this dance is a new one,
A crazier one, a wilder one.

The music changes
The scene is new.
I can't do this alone.

Listen you say,
To the beat of my drum

Take my hand
And I will waltz with you.
A new dance, a new song,
I know you long for beauty.

I will dance with you.

But I wonder.
Could it be?
I have pushed away too many times.

My feet danced to a different beat,
I have failed.

Can I dance again?
Please help me to try.

A dance

Toes pointed, she jumps
A twirl and she lands

She feels free
Amongst the roses
Amongst the thorns
The pain doesn't bother her

The pain within is stronger
It waits to break forth
It waits to be obliterated

The pain will be gone

The pain is as clay
It builds up in her
Dirty and useless

But as she dances
The pain is molded
The clay in the hands of the Great Potter

Now she is dead
She mingles with the ashes
She and they as one

She waits
She waits
Her pain suppressed.

And still the dance goes on

Dance dear child, dance
Let the voices go away
I hear your pain
I see the ashes as your kin
And I see the pain clay.
For tomorrow,
the pot awaits.

The tale of an introvert.

The tale of an introvert.
I am an introvert.

I am scared to be myself.
Cause 'myself' just isn't that amazing.
I trip over things.
I am blur.
I tend to not know stuff that normal people do.

I am an introvert.

I am now sitting in a room.
With my amazing relatives outside.
Why am I not out there with them?
I don't know how to act.
I feel so awkward.

I hate socializing.
But the funny thing is, I like spendinh time with people.
I just don't want to be with people

Ugh. Bye.

May I have this dance?

I lay me down on the ground
I feel the shreds of my being pulled
Pulled, pulled
Relief and then dread
Hope disdained

I know my course
But I am tired
I know the road that is mine
But it is crippled by my pride

May I have this dance
Just one song with you
Will you take my hand
I'll bring you to new lands

Let this song last to eternity
May it never stop or pause
I have come to make you rise
Above the heights, above the sky

You lay down on the ground below
And glance at passing feet as they go
You would rather stay and breathe the sand
But i beseech you to stand

May I have this dance?
Just one song with you
Will you take my hand
I'll bring you to new lands

Amen.

Narnian night

Black
And then the stars shone
And the fauns danced
Their slender bodies in the moonlight
The moles dug
Deeper into the depths of the earthy ground
The naiads danced among the humans

Narnia.
Oh Narnian night
I can see the stars alight
Centaurs stand erect and gaze
Oh Narnia,
Narnian night.

A tribute to the amazing C.S. Lewis who has inspired me and given me hope long after his death through the tales he wove.

Cryptic, though it doesn't quite fit

I don't know if anyone relates
But i have a thing where at different times in my life i have a 'starting' word.
Where whenever i intend to write something artistic, that word comes to mind
The current word is cryptic. Though i haven't actually followed through with it.
So, i'll try.

Cryptic life chips. Float around. Dance around. Try to find their pieces. All so slippery. All unwilling to tie together.
The urge to succeed that is repelled by laziness. Where the life chips refuse to work together. They all need a binding agent.
And it isn't going to be me.
It's got to be Him
But why do i resist.
I guess i love my life chips too much
Even though they only bring me misery.
Help me, i need You.

Him.

She was swept up like the wind sweeps the autumn leaves off the ground. She shone like the summer sun. Her heart as white as snow. She was fully herself and not full of herself. She was free.
But no, not ever before.
For before the flower of who she was ever bloomed, was a visually eternal night, with the slightest glimpse of light.
She sat in her room. Quietly. She scared herself with dark thoughts that lingered amidst the silence. The silence that was full of noise. Her name was Tamara. But she didn't know who she was. She wondered if dawn would ever break forth. And it seemingly did not.
He came in quietly. Like a hobbit of lore. And he wasnt so dashing, no fairytales, no knights.
He smiled as if he knew her but they had never met before. Little did she know, he was all she was looking for, running for, seeking for, dying for.
He said come dear one, i've watched you long. I've waited for your fruit to be ripe, for readiness to come your way.
He took her hand and let her out of it all. And suddenly her room was no more.

He's with you know
Singing a sweet melody
Dancing and laughing
Waiting for you to break forth
Dance, dear one, dance.



Ehem. This wasn't meant to be like, erotic or something.
Its just a product of a slightly emotional state of mind and hope in an amazing God.
That happened two months after July.
Oh how, how time flies.
Don't ask me why!

Ask the butterflies.

You now have permission to laugh at me.
Good night.

It doesn't feel good

Corrupt things allure.
We lust after things that are dead, not living.
Of sex unending and sensuality.
It doesn't feel good.
It takes away the light, the uniqueness of something special, something exciting.

Greed kills joy.
It promises to multiply the joy of the thing in its natural amount.
It doesn't feel good.

Balance is key.
That's the problem with all of us.
It's the simple 'kill the duck that lays the golden egg' story.

Let's be happy.
Happy that we have friends or in some cases including mine, happy that we did have friends in the past and we will have friends in the future.

Happy that we have the gift of food
Not crying cause we cant get that extra piece of cake.

Happy that sex exists as a gift from our heavenly father and that it can be shared with one person, and one alone.

See, we try to make somethings more special by multiplying it. But if we did multiply it, it wouldn't be special anymore.

It's enough in its true nature.

inside out

Failure. Anxiety. Pain. Struggle. Condemnation. Every human being goes through the motions except the ignorant ones. Sure, we may start out as white sheets. But beneath the sheets, fallenness lurks. Before long, resentment and superiority creeps in. Death seeps out from within us. Our sheets become dirtier by the hour and year. Beneath the sheets, the dirt must be cleaned. From the inside out. We must be changed. Or it will never work. Pain always has its source. Illness is never cured by dealing with symptoms. Everything in this fallen world, all of it is a result of one thing. All of it is a result of the death that lurks within every human. We need to be cleaned and purified from the inside out.